Staying abreast of the latest in restaurant-speak can be a taxing endeavor, particularly with the wrenching changes witnessed by the business in recent years. But we’ve got you covered, bucky.
Here’s a self-diagnostic test we’ve put together to help the tragically unhip determine how much head shaking they’re at risk of drawing from younger, cooler peers. If the four listed acronyms read like lines from an eyechart to you, don’t despair. We’ve consulted with a panel of particularly rad business-school grads to nail the meaning for each.
In a matter of days, you’ll be throwing around phrases like “23 skidoo!” and “Groovy!”
The term ESG refers to….
- A test for determining heart health.
- The equivalent for electric cars of MPG.
- Environmental, social, governance concerns.
Correct answer: C, as if that’s a surprise. The acronym is the shorthand used by self-ascribed socially responsible investors to assess the commitment a corporation’s top management shows toward the more-than-profits concerns posed by customers, community, employees, shareholders and any other stakeholder.
It's been prominently in the news lately because of the pushback directed at big brands like McDonald’s and Starbucks.
PFAs refer to …
- A new retro model of children’s sneakers
- The new name for what used to be the Boy Scouts of America and the Girl Scouts of the USA.
- A group of chemicals believed to pose a widespread health threat.
Correct answer: C. Technically, it’s the abbreviation for polyfluoroalkyl substances, though activists, regulators and even scientists refer to them as ”forever chemicals.” That’s because the suspected carcinogens tend not to break down into neutral components. Scientists can tell you the half-life of radioactive materials, but they can’t peg the longevity of PFAs.
For that reason, and the improved functionality they bring to everything from clothing (PKAs add resistance to stains) to fire-extinguishing foam, they tend to be everywhere. Among their common uses is in food packaging, since the chemicals keep a wrapper or box from getting soggy.
There’s a movement building to ban the use of PFAs in foodservice and grocery packaging. More than half a dozen states have already taken measures to limit reliance on the substances, and a federal bill is currently in play. A number of manufacturers have voluntarily ceased using PFAs. But as a recent issue of Consumer Reports noted, the levels in the packaging of many major chains are alarmingly high. The situation promises to spur the search for environmentally friendlier (and possibly costlier) alternatives.
SUD refers to…
- A type of missile being used in the Ukraine war.
- A quality of laundry detergent.
- Substance Use Disease, the new and less-charged new name for addiction.
Correct answer: C again. Health officials are hoping to de-stigmatize the susceptibility of many Americans to a dependence on drugs and alcohol. The idea is to correctly label the affliction as a disease in hopes it will spur more victims to seek help. Authorities are promoting the term as part of a burgeoning effort to address an opioid-abuse problem that’s reached epidemic proportions. And the restaurant industry is proving far from immune.
NFTstands for “non-fungible tokens.” That phrase, in turn, is the label for…
- Tchotchkes and other inexpensive gifts have been treated for black mold.
- Impossible Burger’s new mushroom substitutes.
- One-of-a-kind digital images and virtual items that can’t be duplicated.
Correct answer: If we need to tell you, perhaps forgoing a medical degree was a smart decision. But we’re as clueless as you are as to why these pieces of computer code are currently all the rage. As far as we can tell, they’re of considerable worth because there’s a shared conviction they’re of great value. Utility or art value apparently have little if anything to do with it.
Yet they’re being embraced by restaurants and restaurant customers alike. Sometimes they’re the premium for frequenting a place. Instead of getting a personalized beer glass, you get a snippet of code that depicts a chain’s mascot. Other times, they’re what the customer yearns to buy for bragging rights, and food and beverages are just the convenient add-ons.
The only thing we can say: OMG, WTF.